21 Weeks ๐Ÿ’—

*Sorry in advance for any mistakes…I didn’t have access to a computer so I had to type this post out on my phone.

I am 21 weeks and 3 days pregnant. Just typing that out and seeing it written here on my blog seems unbelievable to me. How have we made it this far without any anemia and without needing a blood transfusion? On Monday I had my 21 week ultrasound to check Nora for anemia and signs of distress. Last week she got about a 1.48 on her MCA scan, dangerously close to needing a blood transfusion. This week it went down to a 1.42! What a wonderful surprise! Once again, the doctor couldn’t see any signs of anemia or distress- no extra fluid or dilating of the heart, so he said to come back in a week for a recheck. He said the weekly IVIG treatments must really be working and keeping Nora safe from my antibodies for now. They measured Nora and she was a little big for 21weeks, weighing in at one pound. This week alone I have met two different families whose babies were born at 24 weeks and each baby weighed one pound at birth (and both survived!) I am so grateful for my big growing girl. I also finally gained my first pound of my pregnancyย this week. My nausea is slowly subsiding and I have an appetite for the first time since November. It is WONDERFUL to actually enjoy some of the food I am eating.

This past week I finally took a leap of faith and bought lots of summer maternity clothes. My normal clothes just aren’t fitting anymore and I have finally allowed myself to actually believe that I might still be pregnant when summer arrives. I was lucky enough to stumble on a maternity section at a local thrift store. Apparently there was someย lady out there who was also pregnant in the summer and she was my EXACT size and she donated her really cute Motherhood maternity clothes to the thrift store ๐Ÿ˜ƒ It was such a blessing since we weren’t sure how we were going to afford a whole new season of maternity clothes (I had mostly winter.) I also bought a cute little sister onesie and hat for our Nora girl. I REALLY hope this is finally our little sister that we get to bring home.

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We are very thankful to be here in Houston in the Ronald McDonald House, so close to such amazing medical care (we can walk to our hospital!) However, the strain of being away from home for so long is finally starting to weigh on all of us. We don’t know how long we will be here, but lately we have been coming to terms with the fact that I will probably deliver Nora here. If she is in danger at all, we can’t risk her life for our convenience. She will have the best medical care and the best chance at life, which means staying in Houston until she arrives. The financial strain is growing with all of the extra medical costs, living costs and the fact that I can’t work while I’m here. The emotional burden feels even heavier at times. When Josh left to go home after his visit I felt depressed, knowing I might not see him for several weeks. Today my Dad left with Liam to go back to Tuscaloosa. Asher begged to go too, then burst into tears when I told him he had to stay here in Houston with me. He wept so hard, “But I want to build a weally big twain twack in my own house and I want to see my puppy and sweep in my bed!” I don’t blame him. I want to sleep in my own bed too (especially with the discomfort of pregnancy.) He cried for a long time and the only thing that kept me from breaking down and crying with him was imagining him crying over his dead baby sister, because that is the alternative. I have seen my sons cry giant tears and beg me for their baby sister to come down from heaven. I have seen them cry because Mommy wouldn’t stop crying and I have seen them neglected for long periods of time while I struggled on my darkest days just to get out of bed after Lucy died. Our suffering now is nothing compared to the pain of losing a child. I know that all of this is worth it if Nora lives.

Thank you all for following our story and praying for us and spurring us on. You give us strength and encouragement and we appreciate every one of you. Please continue to pray for us…for Liam as he is without his Mommy and brother and for Asher as he is away from Daddy, brother and home. Please pray that God takes care of all of our needs while we are here and especially for Him to continue protecting Nora in the womb. What an amazing God we have and what a miracle that He has allowed our Nora to flourish like this. I can’t wait to see what else He is going to do.

Here is the 20 week belly (I haven’t taken a picture this week yet):

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20 thoughts on “21 Weeks ๐Ÿ’—

  1. Hooray! I have been waiting to hear about this week and was close to texting you “are you alright?” I forgot about the lack of computer issue. That makes it hard to write! Seems like RM house should have at least one laptop. I would share mine with you if I could. I am SO glad that Nora continues to do so awesomely! She is growing big and strong in there and God is protecting you both. That is so hard to be away for so long though. I am so ready to go home after even a week away. I will add a prayer for the comfort of all of you in these strange circumstances while Nora is cooking. I am getting really excited about seeing her. And score! on the Motherhood maternity clothes! Those are pricey, so that was an awesome find:) I love bargain finds like that!

    • Thanks, friend! I’m actually on the one community computer here now, but it’s down in the main area and I can only “rent” it for a certain amount of time. It’s kind of awkward and there’s not much privacy. Anyway, the maternity clothes are so cute and I’m so glad I didn’t have to spend a ton of money on clothes that I’ll only wear for a few months. Thanks for always being encouraging ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Thank you Elisha, and His hand is all over your Josiah too, I just wish you didn’t have to wait so long. One of the little babies that I mentioned in my post who was born at 24 weeks is named Josiah and when his mom told me that I felt a surge of excitement because I can’t wait to see your miracle baby Josiah one day (hopefully soon!)

  2. I’m a silent reader for a few months now. “Silent” mostly because I’m not a native Speaker (I’m from Austria) and because most of time I just don’t know what to say. But when there was no post this week I was really worried that something went wrong. And I told myself to finally write a comment if everything would be fine with Nora, just to show a little bit of support and my sympathy for you and your family. I’m so happy that everything is ok and I wish you just the best!

    Take care
    Manuela

    • Thank you for your comment, Manuela! And thank you for following along and caring about my family (I’m always surprised when strangers are so kind and concerned about my Nora) Thank you for the encouragement and support.

  3. We had 7 months of staying in hotels during the last part of my pregnancy and for several months after because of my son’s heart defect. Unfortunately we were only able to be in the RMH for two small chunks of all that time so we lived in 14 different hotels, bouncing around where there was room, where we could afford, where people weren’t mad yet at all the kids running around. Its so rough, I know exactly how you are feeling. Hang in there though because you are so right- your baby is totally worth all of this and in a few years you’ll look back and be so glad you went through everything that is hard about this just to have her.

    • This was really good for me to read (but I’m so sorry you went through all of that!) We are incredibly blessed to be able to stay here for so long! Our alternative would be similar to what you had to do…I can’t even imagine! And thank you for the reminder that it will be all worth it once she gets here. It’s nice to hear from someone who has come out on the other side!

  4. Bethany – we’ve never met, and I found your blog through a baby loss forum, but I wanted to post to say how happy I am to see this update. I’ve been compulsively checking since Monday! I also lost a baby at 19 weeks last year (for much different reasons), and then had a subsequent early pregnancy loss. I am now 20 weeks pregnant (just a week behind you), and for quite a while, following your story here has been a lifeline for me. I have been inspired by your faith and your positivity, and grateful for all of the scriptures you have posted. I, too, have been holding on hard to those promises in the last several weeks. I will continue to hold you and Nora and the rest of your family in prayer.

    • I am so sorry that you lost your two babies but so thankful your rainbow baby is doing great! Pregnancy after loss is so terrifying, whether it’s considered high risk or not. Definitely let me know when your new baby arrives! I’ll be praying for you

  5. I too was starting to get worried after a week without an update. I am so very grateful that all is well. Little Nora is one special little girl.

  6. I’m so glad you finally updated! I’ve been so worried. And a really good update at that! I couldn’t imagine having to be apart from you family especially at a time that is supposed to bring all the family even closer. You and your whole family will be so much stronger once Nora is born!

  7. Hii! I have that cute little onsie from Gap for my little rainbow baby Lily ๐Ÿ™‚ She is 4 months old. Prayers for beautiful Emily and Nora! Love and prayers for this struggle. It will all be worth it! You all are over half way there Count down till the miracle of birth!

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