This past week has flown by and here we are at 23 weeks, one week shy of viability, the biggest milestone that Nora will (hopefully) reach throughout this whole pregnancy. After my IVIG treatment last week we were able to go home for a short visit and it was wonderful. It felt so amazing to see all of my friends and family…siblings, parents, nieces and nephews and of course my Liam and Josh. Walking into my house felt like Christmas day. I didn’t realize how much I missed being home until I was there. I loved the feeling of my own bed, the privacy of being able to wake up in the morning and make coffee in my pajamas, cooking in my own kitchen, I could go on and on. For the third time, I unpacked the baby girl clothes, arranged them by size and organized them in hopes of bringing home our daughter. It was surprisingly hard to do, it almost felt like I was tempting fate by preparing for Nora’s arrival. I’m almost too scared to let myself believe that we might get to keep her. It felt like a huge leap of faith to actually open up the box and put her crib together. Lucy died before we ever bought a crib so we bought this one for Scarlet. We were on the verge of putting it together when we discovered Kailee and Peter’s betrayal. It has been sitting in the box untouched since then, but this past week we put it together and got it ready for our rainbow baby. It is so beautiful, exactly how I always imagined.

Asher was also SO excited to be home especially since he got to play with his brother (they miss each other desperately) and his cousins.

We drove back to Houston on Easter day and the next day was my 23 week appointment. Nora looked great on the ultrasound again. Her MCA scans ranged from 1.33-1.57. I had several different people do the MCA scan and all of the readings were below 1.5 except for two. The doctors discussed their plan of action and decided to give her another week to grow. They explained that this is pretty much the same range of numbers that Nora is in every week (and has been for about a month) and her anemia levels are not “trending upward.” If they notice that her MCA scans start moving upward or that she has more readings over 1.5 than under, they will do a blood transfusion. Every week that Nora gets  to grow means that the blood transfusion will be safer and she will have a higher chance of survival. Next week she will be considered viable which means she could survive outside of the womb (with A LOT of risks and A LOT of intervention.) I asked the doctors when they would give me the steroid shots to develop Nora’s lungs and they said they would only give them if they felt like she was going to be delivered soon. Since she is doing so well they don’t think she needs them right now, which is very encouraging. I also asked the doctors what their plan was if Nora continues to stay where she is every week, right under the anemia cut off of 1.5. They said they plan to continue the weekly IVIG treatments until 35 or 36 weeks and then they will deliver. So far the IVIG is suppressing my antibodies just barely enough to keep Nora safe in the womb. Please continue to pray that she stays under the anemia level and that she does not need a blood transfusion. Also, please pray that my port does not get infected. Since it goes directly into my jugular and straight down to the opening of my heart, any infection would spread through my body rapidly and would be very dangerous for Nora. I’ve had this port in since January so we’ve done a good job of keeping it infection free since then, but lately it has started showing some possible signs of infection so I’m a little worried.

Every week when I get another good report from the doctor I am absolutely astounded. It feels like a new miracle every single week. All of the doctors besides one, gave Nora a 50% chance of surviving this pregnancy. Do you know what they were basing that 50% on? They were saying that she would only survive if she got my blood type, a 50% chance of happening. Well we’ve known for several weeks now that Nora did not get my blood type, she got her Daddy’s which would then put her odds of survival at 0%, if the doctors were right. But here she is, kicking inside me and doing flips right at this moment, full of LIFE, proving them all wrong. Sometimes I start to imagine that God is saying, “I told you so.” All those times after Lucy died that I broke down, literally lying on the floor sobbing and begging Him to give me another baby girl, He was listening. I wasn’t alone after all.

Psalm 9:12  He does not forget the cry of the afflicted.

Nora doing her creepy smile

Our pretty girl at 23 weeks